Thursday, 17 December 2015

Ain't no butterflies. 25.

2016 is upon us.
counting down...
Im turning 25 next year.

this means what ever I am saying here,
it has everything & at the same time,
absolutely nothing to do with age.

its realisation.
& yes, the one thing I dreaded the most.
growing the f up.

& whoever thought growing up meant being less fun 
they're wrong.

there is a way to grow up and still hold on to that fun inside.

we DONT stop enjoying,
we DO have bigger priorities.

we DIDN'T lose ourselves, 
we DO find much more potential and life than temporary happiness.

Its just so easy for us to hate where we are,
its not enough,
its this' fault.
thats' fault.
its nobody's fault.

lets start where we are,
with what we have,
& do what we can,
to get to where we want to be. 

Life doesn't start tomorrow.
its here today,
it begins at the end of your comfort zone.
(& that comfort zone is your mind) 

here goes.

my list of substantial life goals.

(Hey, I'm still learning too)


Starting from within, 
I learnt that the greatest part of being a better you, 
its to know yourself better.
Yes obviously we ALL think we know ourselves so well.
We don't.

Start by talking to the people you're closest with.

Ever since I stopped putting up with mundane jobs to get by,
I woke up with more rest, and a clearer mind.
I felt better and more connected to myself than ever.

I started having more time with my family 
and slowly got to talking & spending time 
with my mother, father and boyfriend more.
I started to ask of their opinions. 
Instead of just putting up with what they say,
I listened. (well eventually)
I analysed their tone and their views of who I am.
Share, receive, learn.

It starts out tough for some, like it did for me.
We often find it so difficult to hear bad things about yourself.
So we tend to cut them off and ignore.
Like most of what people think today,
"Heck, I be who I am!" 

don't mistake stubbornness for determination.
learn the difference.

Thats why Im saying listen to those who love you.
*more about love on the later sections

Connecting with our innermost desires
takes so much discovery and courage.

its a little of going with your heart
and also taking leaps
heaps of determination
and a drop of fearlessness.

sometimes we just got to take the chance.
depending of course, how much you really want a life 
thats truly connected to who you truly are.

Don't just go on living just to stay alive. 

Make your own choices and have no regrets.
knowing your strengths and weaknesses so definitely
you can embrace it 
and work your achievements around, against and with it.

because passion takes sacrifice,
and you cant sacrifice if u don't know your strengths.

just like how a leap works,
you need to know how far u can jump, and how hard the impact would hurt u,
does it scare u?
if it does, does it matter? can u get over it?
do you believe in yourself?

Learn your strengths,
use them against your limits,
know your pieces, so you could build a better you. 


To say better things we must first listen to ourselves.
Thinking before we speak.
Speaking slower and more carefully.

Yeah, some of us would think,
why do I have to watch my tongue so much?

Well no one knows how much words could hurt,
until someone hurts you with their words.

What I'm saying is,
learning to be a pleasant person 
also comes with a response.

"Have more than you show, speak less than you know"

this meant revealing less about yourselves.
keep the details out.
no one needs to know every weakness and strengths you have.
no, not even the closest sometimes.

sometimes its so tough to hold out tongues back
when we have so much to prove.
but what does speech do to prove anything?

"speak only if it improves upon the silence"

is there anything that you have to fix?
does it affect you if it doesn't?

ask yourself the next time u want to argue. 
is this necessary? 
would aggression make this better?

agree to disagree.

everytime you find yourself stuck in a situation of choices,
make a light choice,
in other means,
use a general response about your views,
and then make sure to mention that to each their own, 
"of course we all have our own opinions and preferences" 
"maybe theres a way to compromise"

sometimes people fail to see in our perspective,
so its our privilege to have or learn the ability to see it in theirs.
whether it is to see that they do not see it, 
or to see what they see. 

 Keep apologies simple.
Explain if u need, but don't give excuses.

sometimes just as simple as it is. 
Admitting we are wrong.


As I grew,
I learnt more and more to appreciate the silence inside.

I think sometimes its okay to stop the output
and just appreciate the input.

sometimes its nice to go around quiet,
and just listen, observe and learn.
thinking helps me connect.
It lets me place my thoughts, rearrange them, edit them.

it forms personality. 
Observing the world move, 
and then moving on to observing peoples actions, words and behaviour...
understanding them,
lets us understand ourselves better.

every time I come across questionable unpleasant behaviours,
I ask myself,
Why do I not like this?
Why does someone say/do such things?
what are they trying to achieve?
do I apprehend such behaviour?

Train your mind to see a good in every situation.

Put it all in a list,
embed the great lessons around you in yourself.
they're great ways to learn indirectly.
take others' mistakes and stories
and make sure that you don't commit the same.

at the same time,
get inspired.
learn and learn. 
surround yourself in positive activities
spaces, art and people. 

get addicted to good vibes.
learning to stand up and keep chasing your goals
we can all dream for only that long.
but it takes a true fighter to stand up and 
start crawling, walking, jogging, running to our greater  realities. 


The next step to moving forward?
Being able to let go.

In what sense?
every sense.

People, things, memories, lifestyle.
We all say that people don't change.
well yes, the basics of a person will always remain,
such as your personality,

but we do change, 
experience changes us,
understanding and learning changes us.
small but significant changes.

when we find our way, 
we find all the ways that isn't. 

Learning to drift apart from things that do not encourage your growth is a process.
I guess it becomes natural as soon as you begin working on yourself.

Cleaning up is really a part of growth.
Decluttering so that you gain productivity.
Arranging and organising your life so that everything is in order
and slowly learning to just stop dwelling over petty matters.

Clean up your own mess;
be responsible for yourself 

so that others do not have to do it for you.

I'm still learning. 
you should too! 


Its okay to refuse to take advice from people who don't even have their own shit together

after learning what you want in life
its important that we work towards that directions

accepting the fact that we have only this much attention and time to spare
why not spend it surrounding ourselves with people who inspire us to become better?

We need to learn that not all words are wisdom.
That constructive criticism are hard to come by
and that most people only speak with selfish thoughts.

and even more doesn't give thoughts to their words, 
instead, merely actively trying to convert others to their views.

so hear people out, but listen selectively
learn from the bad ones, 
keep the good ones as gold.


Hardwork, Determination, 
the drive for success.

these are, like, magic elements.
they make us better humans

good things come to those who work for it.

Life is rough
and tough times feels longer than the good
and thats an inevitable fact

the trick here is really to just know that fact in mind
so when you fall 
when you cry
you'd know to tell yourself
its okay, 
we'll stand up after this. 

gain the strength to hold yourself up.

and thats how we take life one step at a time.
with a goal in our hearts
and a clear mind of our thoughts.

Sheer determination,
Positive thoughts,
a Brave Heart, 
a Kind soul,
perseverance and
a will to fight.